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Reality is one of the most cumbersome things people misconstrue and run from. Even as life plays itself out, we refuse to live it, and many times, we are said to be in denial over several difficult situations (or even pleasant ones) in our lives. Let’s be honest, it’s hard to accept certain things, especially when we can hardly recognise them as so. People would rather bask in denial.
Reality is the occurrence of events at any point in time. It is the real deal — the actual or very circumstance we are found in. It cannot be eluded, erased, or manipulated. It is as is. What makes accepting reality difficult is our interpretation of them. Sometimes, the way we want things to be interferes with the way they are perceived. The brain and mind were made up in such a way as to protect us from harm. Therefore, any situation or occurrence that may pose a threat to any aspect of our living – be it emotional, spiritual, professional, or mental – is bound to be subdued. In which case, we misconstrue the actual thing happening to mean something else so that we can (unintentionally, if I may add) be afloat.
Of course, being in denial is protective but the shell needs to come off at some point. We need to peel the layers of lies, interpretation, and modification of the truth so that we can be free (pun intended). We need to accept reality for what it is so that we can truly live. Otherwise, we would still be portraying acts of survival, which is arduous and isn’t necessarily authentic.
Some helpful tips for accepting reality should come from a pact we make with ourselves to let go, especially of our delusion. Because if we don’t make up our minds, our minds will make up something else to keep us away from feeling. And feeling is one of our most humane characteristics. I reiterate that we feel because we need to live – more than survive, at the very least. Once we’ve made that pact, it becomes a bit easier to welcome our reality. Be it with our relationships with ourselves and others, or regarding other areas of our lives.
During the process of welcoming our reality, we are bound to feel a lot of (difficult) emotions and that’s very confirmatory and okay too. Nobody said welcoming the truth is any fun. It’s just important we do so to make sure we’re aligned with our present. We must accept our truth and make sure we create the necessary boundaries, principles, and values that will push us ahead. The difficult emotions will not kill you; it’s simply communicating different things to you that you need to pay attention to. Because at the end of the day, if you misread or avoid any of them, you’re bound to repeat the cycle of avoidance, regret, inner chaos, and another round of difficult emotions, until you accept the message of accepting reality as is, not what you wish or want it to be like.
See it this way: you cannot live life backwards (based on how it used to be) or in a fast-forward mode (based on how you wish it to be). You have to live your life now, right now, dealing with all the different realities playing out in the many sectors of your life. To avoid that vicious cycle and unnecessary suffering.
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Feature Image by Mental Health America (MHA) for Pexels
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