At 91, Our 66-Year Marriage Is Still Going Strong. Here Are 3 Reasons Why

I can be pretty cynical, but I have to confess that ― whether I’m single or taken ― something about Valentine’s Day has always warmed my frosty heart. 

I can tell myself I simply look forward to the discounted chocolates and enjoy the spectacle of suddenly abundant flowers, but to be honest, I’m probably a diehard romantic in denial. 

Perhaps one of the reasons why I’m so hesitant to admit my inner sentimentalism is that dating problems, from ghosting to losing that “spark” and even breaking up ― are so common. 

So it’s a good thing online care finder Lottie has asked the wisest minds among us ― those of care home residents ― for advice on some common dating woes. 

After all, who could be more qualified to talk about how to keep the spark alive in a long-term relationship than couple Norman and Betty (both 91), who have been married for 66 years and now live together at Blossomfield Rose Care Home in Solihull?

Norman has three rules for couples who are in it for the long haul 

Norman shared that the secret to keeping your significant other happy in the long term is following three simple rules. 

“Hold hands, buy the lady some flowers and ALWAYS show respect for their
age,” he advised

Meanwhile, 91-year-old Dougie from Droitwich Mews Care Home reckons a little time apart from one another is a good way to keep couples interested. 

“Sometimes distance is best for keeping your wife happy,” he commented. 

As for the women’s perspective, 94-year-old Madge (who lives with 96-year-old husband Jeff at Studley Rose Care Home, 74 years into their marriage) says the key to managing disagreements with her beau is “letting him think he is always right.” 

Any other pearls of wisdom?

92-year-old Geraldine, a resident at Cheriton Care Home in Dorchester, married her “first and last” boyfriend at 18. 

She says that avoiding unnecessary arguments is key ― “when you start to bicker, you need to calm the situation down straight away. You’ve got to say, that’s enough, ’we’ll talk about it later”.

That way, she claims, “the argument goes away”.

96-year-old Eileen, a resident at Beaconsfield Heights Care Home, says that “the gentleman should always pay on a first date”.

Perhaps relatedly, 87-year-old Peter from Woodlands Care Home warns: “Stay away from women; they
cost you a fortune”.

Meanwhile, 85-year-old Hilary’s advice is short and sweet: “as partners, you should always stick together,” she shared.